What is left?

why is it important to me to engage with the Alevi belief?

I was born and grew up in Turkey. I was raised with Alevi values but strong assimilation of Alevi people into Sunni Muslim culture always confused me as it was very different from the knowledge I was brought up with. The ongoing discrimination forced me to hide my identity. The oppression alienated me from my culture.

 I decided to distance myself from my roots. I went to France and later to Germany to study choreography. An incident happening after one of my performances reminded me that as Alevi I lost touch with that part of my identity. Remembering that, seeing the complexity of history and having desire to understand tangled dynamics between having deeply embedded Alevi principles yet being very alienated to practices, I decided to work on what being an Alevi and Alevism in general mean to me. How could I face my past, my personal confusions and traumas? How as a female choreographer could I develop tools to critically reflect on the topic of faith, religious rituals and embedded in them ideals? At that time my son was born. I wanted to teach him values but I have realized that in order to do so I need to find out where mine are coming from.






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